Fashionably late, we apply our new boat name and have a renaming ceremony, complete with champagne, pomp and circumstance!

Before we can hop offshore, we need to make sure our boat is properly identified. I mean, technically we were supposed to get this done six months ago.

We got rid of all the old boat name decals back in July, and now that we’ve purged Liliana from our boat, it’s time to ask Poseidon to purge the name from his records with the gift of champagne:

Oh mighty and great ruler of the seas and oceans, to whom all ships and we who venture upon your vast domain are required to pay homage, implore you in your graciousness to expunge for all time from your records and recollection the name Liliana, which has ceased to be an entity in your kingdom. As proof thereof, we submit this ingot bearing her name to be corrupted through your powers and forever be purged from the sea.

In grateful acknowledgment of your munificence and dispensation, we offer these libations to your majesty and your court.

After that, we ask for his grace and protection for Hobbes, sweetening our request with a little more champagne:

Oh mighty and great ruler of the seas and oceans, to whom all ships and we who venture upon your vast domain are required to pay homage, implore you in your graciousness to take unto your records and recollection this worthy vessel hereafter and for all time known as Hobbes, guarding her with your mighty arm and trident and ensuring her of safe and rapid passage throughout her journeys within your realm.

In appreciation of your munificence, dispensation and in honor of your greatness, we offer these libations to your majesty and your court.

Then we share some champagne as celebration! We’ve got a name!

Now that we have implored Poseidon, it’s time to address the four cardinal gods, with a gift of champagne to each:

Oh mighty rulers of the winds, through whose power our frail vessels traverse the wild and faceless deep, we implore you to grant this worthy vessel Hobbes the benefits and pleasures of your bounty, ensuring us of your gentle ministration according to our needs.

(Facing north) Great Boreas, exalted ruler of the North Wind, grant us permission to use your mighty powers in the pursuit of our lawful endeavors, ever sparing us the overwhelming scourge of your frigid breath.

(Facing west) Great Zephyrus, exalted ruler of the West Wind, grant us permission to use your mighty powers in the pursuit of our lawful endeavors, ever sparing us the overwhelming scourge of your wild breath.

(Facing east) Great Eurus, exalted ruler of the East Wind, grant us permission to use your mighty powers in the pursuit of our lawful endeavors, ever sparing us the overwhelming scourge of your mighty breath.

(Facing south) Great Notus, exalted ruler of the South Wind, grant us permission to use your mighty powers in the pursuit of our lawful endeavors, ever sparing us the overwhelming scourge of your scalding breath.

Now that we’ve officially implored the gods for protection, we finalize the name application to our transom. We’re very happy with the vinyl we ordered, it went on very easily and we love the font and dark gray color.

I hopped on our neighbor Randall’s boat to assess how crooked it is (it’s not? But it’s not like the boat ever stays level for more than a few seconds).

Finally, we add a coat of wax to it, since most of our wash water will drain down the transom we want the name to be protected.

When I uncorked the champagne, the cork jetted off like a rocket ship, I swear it was halfway across the marina. Then, as we were finishing up the name, what happened to float by? The very same cork! I don’t know much about superstition but that’s got to be a good sign. The gods have drunk our champagne and found it to be acceptable.

Better late than never, we are officially official. Hobbes is ready to go offshore.